Dual....:-)
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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