Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
