i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
