He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
