mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Randomize
