so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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