im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
