I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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