Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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