She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
someone owes me an orgasm
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
