I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
