i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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