Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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