you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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