he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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