I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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