as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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