It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize