At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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