Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize