Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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