ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
