i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
