good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
