So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
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day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
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she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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