well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize
