I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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