What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I came so hard my ears popped.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
