yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize