I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
