hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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