I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize