I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
