So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
