thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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