I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
