I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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