oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Randomize