New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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