Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
