Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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