i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
