Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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