Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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