Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
