i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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