Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Randomize
