im gay
i know
yea but for you.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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