What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
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