a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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