What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
